Don’t you love it when someone gives you a gift? I do.
Whether it’s for my birthday, Christmas, or “just because” (my favorite
kind!), I love receiving gifts.
Recently, my friend Sharon gave me a coffee cup with butterflies on it, “just
because”. It is one of my favorites and
I use it often.
I got another gift once, however, that ended up on the shelf. It wasn’t a Christmas fruitcake, a pair of
loud knee socks, or even a Chia pet. It
was the gift of song.
Here’s how it happened:
Music has always been a big part of my life since childhood, and, as an
adult, I taught music and sang in church.
In 2000, I accidentally started writing songs. I say “accidentally”, meaning I never set out to be a
songwriter. During a difficult time, God
had started downloading lyrics and music into my heart, touching my spirit in a
very loving and comforting way. I got
excited about this new-found blessing, and started studying songwriting and
looking for opportunities to share my songs with others.
Bit by bit, it became all about Carolyn the Songwriter and
promoting her to the world. I was going
to share this gift with everyone! I
scheduled concerts at Christian bookstores, developed flyers, attended
Christian artist competitions and workshops, started a recording project, and
sang my songs for whomever would listen (whether they were interested or not!). One by one, the doors closed in my face, and
I became frustrated and discouraged.
Had I made a mistake, was it all a cruel joke on the part of the Giver,
to give me songs and no place to take them?
I put the gift on a shelf and pursued ministry at my local
church. Looking back, now it is clear
that God was pruning me, cutting off self-centered motives, and preparing me
for what was ahead.
In February, I got an email from a company called Incubator
Creative Group, offering me three free webinars on music ministry. I was suspicious, but as a longtime veteran
of time-share presentations, I knew how to say “no” to what they were selling and
escape with the free goodies! As they
started sharing a different way to approach music ministry, God re-awakened the
sense of calling in my heart and I began to cry. They understood the longing I had to make a difference in
people’s lives. Their values were so
different from the Contemporary Christian music system that I had thought I had
to copy, to “break into”. Instead, I
learned that God was preparing a specific small group of people for me to
minister to deeply, in my little corner of the world. Obscurity was something to be embraced, not something to escape. I learned that I was the gift, that the music
was only the wrapping, that God could work through me to care for others, using
my unique story. (I could be myself!) Maybe
it was time to take the gift off the shelf.
We embarked on a lengthy process of getting to know each other. I was receiving wonderful training and
support from experienced people who obviously understood the artist
temperament. They had been where I
wanted to go and could show me the way.
Later on, I learned that this was an application process and that they were
checking me out thoroughly. What a
scary thought for an approval-addict! I
feared that the verdict would come back, “Sorry, but you’re just not cut out
for this”, and I would be hauling my gift back to the closet shelf.
When Nate and Tami invited me to sign on as an Incubator
roster artist, I couldn’t believe my ears!
I thought at first that maybe they had grabbed the wrong tape and were
talking about a different Carolyn!
Much has changed since February. The folks at Incubator have become trusted friends. There is a new direction and focus to my
activities. I now have a proven system
to follow that puts all the pieces together in a logical and very spiritual
fashion. My prayer life is changing as
I am becoming more aware of all the people in the Body of Christ that He is
fitting together for His work. I am
learning to listen for God’s voice and to trust Him to lead. I am being held accountable to be faithful
with the gift I have been given.
In I Timothy 4:14, we are encouraged to “stir up” (awaken, lift
up, bring to life, set on fire) the gift that has been given us. That has become my verse for this season. With the right mix of “hugs” and “kicks in
the rear” from Incubator, I will be connecting with the patron family who have
already been hand-picked by God, going to Boot Camp, where I will get
instruction in songwriting, vocal skills, and other ministry expressions, and learning
how to organize the day-to-day logistics of music ministry. I feel hopeful and optimistic, and a little
nervous, but I know that I can trust God for each next step, if I just keep
walking. He has it all planned out
already! (Jer. 29:11)
Thank you for your prayers and partnership. You are an expression of God’s grace and the
work we are doing together is giant, eternal stuff! What an honor to be chosen to further God’s stellar reputation in
the world, to His praise and glory!
Well, gotta go… I
have a special gift to unwrap. Talk to
you soon!
Hugs,
Carolyn
