ave you ever been afraid to fully follow a dream or pursue the thing you know you are supposed to do? I have, but...
God is changing that in a big way.
I began singing at a very young age. In fact, I have said for years that my heart beats to worship. Worshiping through music for me is the most direct path to God’s presence. All the stress, pain and fear seem to slip away and awareness of His presence overwhelm me as I sing about and to my Creator. I wish I could say that happens every time I open my Bible, or sit down to pray, but truthfully...for me, something happens in my heart and soul when music combines with my prayers.
I fell in love with God at a young age, but still lived a hard life. Grief, loss and pain are a big part of my story. I remember telling God that He could take anything away from me, but just not my hearing...Please! Well, God had other plans.
At 24 I gave birth to my beautiful daughter Jessie. Soon after we realized that I had started to lose my hearing. It got bad...and fast. I went from singing regularly to not being able to sing, or even hear people speak who were just feet away from me. I had to give up on my love of music and found myself withdrawing from life, people and even God. Within 16 months, my hearing loss had progressed so rapidly that surgery became the only option.
Thankfully, surgery was able to restore most of my hearing. My hearing is not perfect. I deal with constant ringing in my ears, trouble with ambient noise or distortion and I’m definitely not the person to ask, “do you hear that feedback?” since I’ll likely say no. God has restored me in many ways and I am back leading worship and seeking Him through song.
Yes To Worshiping Him Through Song
Yes to believing He is able to do great things.
Yes to trusting Him with all of me and not just a snippet of my heart.
Yes to the truth that He can use me to bless others if I am willing.
So now what?
I struggled with the feeling that I could have certain conversations with other entrepreneurs while those in ministry didn’t understand what I was wrestling with in the areas of faith, finance and ministry.
Tami Rowbatham and Nate Sakany were leading a workshop about Ministry Entrepreneurs at the worship conference. My heart, mind and soul screamed a huge YES! Finally, I could talk about all the aspects of my life with people who GOT IT. There was a model for combining ministry, worship and an entrepreneurial spirit!!! (Friends, if you can’t hear the excitement through the paper/internet, just imagine me with a great big smile and my arms raised high!)
I began a long process of application with Incubator where I submitted song samples, listened to training, submitted responses and sought to see God’s desire for me. I had to regularly ask God, “Is this what you want for me?” Honestly, my response many times was “Pursuing worship and ministry can’t be your desire God. I must need to work harder and try to earn it.” God is having to break through some lies in my life about being a “Human-Doing” instead of a “Human-Being” as well as seeking Him instead of others approval. Incubator has been journeying with me and looking at me with a critical eye, “Is this person someone we can help build a sustainable ministry that blesses others?” “Does Jennie have a story that will minister to others and draw them closer to Him?”
I’m truly honored and excited to say I’ve been accepted as a Roster Artist with Incubator Creative Group and am now truly on the path to seeking, discovering and deploying His ministry through me. He is stripping away all the titles and things I attempted to add on instead and He is calling me to truly trust Him.
I’m ready to face everything and rise!
God is changing that in a big way.
“Just don’t take my hearing…”
I began singing at a very young age. In fact, I have said for years that my heart beats to worship. Worshiping through music for me is the most direct path to God’s presence. All the stress, pain and fear seem to slip away and awareness of His presence overwhelm me as I sing about and to my Creator. I wish I could say that happens every time I open my Bible, or sit down to pray, but truthfully...for me, something happens in my heart and soul when music combines with my prayers.I fell in love with God at a young age, but still lived a hard life. Grief, loss and pain are a big part of my story. I remember telling God that He could take anything away from me, but just not my hearing...Please! Well, God had other plans.
At 24 I gave birth to my beautiful daughter Jessie. Soon after we realized that I had started to lose my hearing. It got bad...and fast. I went from singing regularly to not being able to sing, or even hear people speak who were just feet away from me. I had to give up on my love of music and found myself withdrawing from life, people and even God. Within 16 months, my hearing loss had progressed so rapidly that surgery became the only option.
Thankfully, surgery was able to restore most of my hearing. My hearing is not perfect. I deal with constant ringing in my ears, trouble with ambient noise or distortion and I’m definitely not the person to ask, “do you hear that feedback?” since I’ll likely say no. God has restored me in many ways and I am back leading worship and seeking Him through song.
“Can I trust you God?”
It has been over 15 years since the surgeries to restore my hearing, yet I’ve been holding my calling, my purpose, my gift of worshipping through music with very timid hands and heart. It is as if I’ve been saying, “God, if I give my heart fully to worship, will you take it again?” God has been working on my heart and has even helped me answer some of the what-if’s related to the possibility of further hearing loss and is calling me to take the step of faith to say YES.Yes To Worshiping Him Through Song
Yes to believing He is able to do great things.
Yes to trusting Him with all of me and not just a snippet of my heart.
Yes to the truth that He can use me to bless others if I am willing.
So now what?
“They are saying exactly what I needed to hear…”
A few years ago I attended a conference for worship leaders. At the time I was working in the coaching industry and was wrestling with how do ministry, faith and finance work together? I had seen examples of a few “Christian” business owners who were hypocrites and I’d seen other truly gifted artists struggling to make ends meet. Of course there were also those that just couldn’t seem to make a mistake in business.I struggled with the feeling that I could have certain conversations with other entrepreneurs while those in ministry didn’t understand what I was wrestling with in the areas of faith, finance and ministry.
Tami Rowbatham and Nate Sakany were leading a workshop about Ministry Entrepreneurs at the worship conference. My heart, mind and soul screamed a huge YES! Finally, I could talk about all the aspects of my life with people who GOT IT. There was a model for combining ministry, worship and an entrepreneurial spirit!!! (Friends, if you can’t hear the excitement through the paper/internet, just imagine me with a great big smile and my arms raised high!)
I began a long process of application with Incubator where I submitted song samples, listened to training, submitted responses and sought to see God’s desire for me. I had to regularly ask God, “Is this what you want for me?” Honestly, my response many times was “Pursuing worship and ministry can’t be your desire God. I must need to work harder and try to earn it.” God is having to break through some lies in my life about being a “Human-Doing” instead of a “Human-Being” as well as seeking Him instead of others approval. Incubator has been journeying with me and looking at me with a critical eye, “Is this person someone we can help build a sustainable ministry that blesses others?” “Does Jennie have a story that will minister to others and draw them closer to Him?”
I’m truly honored and excited to say I’ve been accepted as a Roster Artist with Incubator Creative Group and am now truly on the path to seeking, discovering and deploying His ministry through me. He is stripping away all the titles and things I attempted to add on instead and He is calling me to truly trust Him.
F.E.A.RHave you heard this acronym for FEAR...False Evidence Appearing Real? Well, I’ve adapted a new one I heard recently…
Face Everything And RiseThere are still things that can get in the way, but I am choosing to rise and follow my dream of living a life devoted to God’s purpose for me. God and I have places to go and people to minister to. I want to follow my Rabbi so closely on the journey that the dust from His sandals covers me.
I’m ready to face everything and rise!
